by Mayo Clinic News Network

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According to Rosean Bishop, Ph.D., Psychiatry & Psychology, Mayo Clinic Health System, Mankato, Minnesota, resilient people are made, not born. Becoming more resilient is something that can be developed at any age or phase of life.

Rosean Bishop offers seven strategies to build resiliency:

Building resiliency

1. Identify three good things at the beginning or end of your day

These don't have to be huge. For most people, positive events are in the low- to moderate-size range, like running into a friend at the store, finding a forgotten dollar in a pocket or learning that the weird noise in your car only required a quick and inexpensive fix.

What matters isn't the intensity of positive experiences; it's the frequency of recognizing them.

This exercise helps train our brains to pay more attention to the positive. Try identifying three good things every day for two weeks, and you'll automatically begin recognizing those positive kernels.

2. Practice gratitude

Ask yourself, "Who or what am I grateful for?" Once again, this is more than just big things, because it's easy to forget all the small things you appreciate.

A study conducted among nuns asked them to count their blessings rather than burdens. They were divided into two groups. One kept a daily journal of their blessings; the other was the control group. Researchers found that the nuns who expressed more gratitude lived up to a decade longer than those in the control group.

To practice this resiliency skill, regularly jot down what you're grateful for or send someone a gratitude letter, email or text.

3. Try something different

Your brain loves novelty and the new. Notice the new playground equipment at the park or take a different route to the store. At the store, pick up an item you've never tried before.

4. Spend time in nature

Nature is full of novelty. Notice the beauty around you: what's in the sky above, the bark patterns on a tree and how light streams through clouds after a storm. Try spending five minutes outdoors and mentally noting what you see, smell, hear and feel.

5. Focus on what you can control

You're stuck in traffic. There's nothing you can do about the fender bender that just happened ahead of you. Do you get all worked up? Or do you take deep breaths to tamp down the stress and evaluate the situation? Are you in danger? No. Are you going to miss a flight? Probably not.

Is there an exit ahead you can take? Yes. Is this a tragedy or an inconvenience? Inconvenience. Will this matter 10 days from now? No.

Focus on what you can control: your reaction to the situation.

6. Foster relationships

Relationships are essential to resiliency. You can connect with friends and family for different reasons. It's these people who you value and who value you. They're the ones who will be there for you when faced with the challenges of life, both large and small.

7. Be mindful

Mindfulness is focusing on the moment and paying attention. But being mindful is tough. The brain is easily hijacked from the now by thoughts of the past and future and judgmental thoughts about ourselves and others.

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